April Fool's Jokes
April Fool's Jokes oplinOPLIN has a reputation for producing pretty good April Fool's jokes over the years. We were even informed that people at PLA were eagerly anticipating our latest endeavor for the prank-pushing holiday. It occurred to us that we might want to create a record of these.
Note that no jokes were created or dispersed in either 2020 or 2021, due to the coronavirus pandemic.
April Fool's 2025
April Fool's 2025FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
OPLIN Announces Sweet New Partnership
April 1, 2025 – [Columbus, OH] – OPLIN is thrilled to announce a delicious new strategic partnership with the iconic Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream*. Together, we’re launching an exclusive flavor that celebrates innovation and creative thinking.
The new flavor, Bits and Chips, is a bold twist on classic vanilla—loaded with crunchy computer chips and circuit board fragments. It’s the perfect blend of tech and treat, designed for IT staff, tech problem solvers, and snackers alike. With so many awesome ingredients, it’s hard to process!
Bits and Chips will be available for a limited time between 2359 to 0000 hours at the OPLIN office tonight. Maybe.
*This is a joke. Sadly.
April Fool's 2024
April Fool's 2024
(Red circle added at the bottom for posterity.)
April Fool's 2023
April Fool's 2023 oplinEvery spring, OPLIN endeavors to bring at yeast one new service to Ohio public libraries. This year, we're proud to annouce that we have not been loafing around. This new offering won't even cost your library any dough.
April Fool's 2022
April Fool's 2022 oplinApril Fool's 2019
April Fool's 2019 oplinDo you miss those unique sounds that your old modem used to make? For those who prefer the classic Internet connection, OPLIN will be offering dial-up service in 3 flavors: 1200, 2400 baud and for super speed, 56K!
April Fool's 2018
April Fool's 2018 oplinIntroducing: Hey OPLIN, our new voice assistant service.
April Fool's 2017
April Fool's 2017 oplinFOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: April 1, 2017
OPLIN TO OFFER NEW TELECOMMUNICATIONS SERVICE
Most-requested service to begin in 2018
Columbus, Ohio: Many libraries have requested that OPLIN expand its telecommunications services to better serve the needs of library patrons. In 2018, OPLIN plans to roll out next-gen telepathy, in order to further accommodate these requests. This will be of particular interest to reference and readers’ advisory staff, who have often been forced to employ such arcane methods as chatting and reference interviews. With the introduction of the telepathy service, library staff will be able to quickly and efficiently determine what patrons are actually asking for at the reference desk.
The initial feedback from the testing phase has been very positive. “O.M.G. I seriously couldn’t believe how fast it was,” raved Ms. Marian Paroo, of the River City Public Library. “I knew right away which blue-covered book that man wanted.” Even library IT staff have been impressed, and have found telepathy extremely useful when troubleshooting. “Now I know if someone really rebooted that PC before they call me,” says tech specialist “Nick the IT Guy.”
Next-gen telepathy uses the latest in FTP (Foresight Transfer Protocol) and no passwords are required, since telepathy users will know them all, anyway. It also is very security conscious; telepathy uses SSL (Soundless Sensory Language) to protect patron privacy even better than a tin foil hat. However, for those who cannot handle modern technology, Tinfoil Cranial Protection (TCP) is available. The new service will be available in the second quarter of 2018, providing that no one disbelieves in telepathy. OPLIN also hopes to add related features at a later date, including teleportation and telekinesis.
About OPLIN: The Ouija Public Library Information Network provides various telecommunications and information technology services to public libraries in the state of Ohio. The staff consists of five really smart people with a sense of humor, three of whom admit to punning.
April Fool's 2016
April Fool's 2016 oplinHey, OPLIN finally has a mascot! (Libraries have had them forever, so it's about time we got one, right?)
Please welcome our new buddy, Fiber, making his official debut.